WHAT a Weekend???

OK, I have just now been able to clear my head enough to explain how GREAT last weekend was - and I am ready to do it again.

Money and I fly to Charleston on Thursday afternoon. Money ran the dry run (or, wet run as it were) by getting his 1 quart plastic bag and placing 6 mini bottles in it and running it thru the security checkpoint. TSA did not stop him, ask any questions, or do the full body cavity search. SCORE. As long as it is less that 3 oz they can't say any thing.

We rent the Dodge Charger and try to put the golf clubs in the trunk - that wasn't going to happen. Magic's hard club carrier was a bitch to fit in the car so we laid the seats down. I love traveling with golf clubs - It's like giving all the other men at the baggage claim the subtle FINGER, "I came here to play golf - you came with your family - I win Fucker!!!"
We take Momma out to dinner and dump her back home and go out.

We hit Madra Rua in old Downtown North Charleston and it is awesome. We take pen and paper and start making rules and penalties for Friday's golf match. We come up with a grid with group scores, lowest score, least amount of putts, closest to the pin, etc. Then we came up with individual penalties that went into the Penalty Bucket: 3 putts or more, double par or worse, lost ball, not driving past women's tee's, 2 or more shots in the same sandtrap, etc. All these penalties could be won by the putt off at the end of the match. That made it fun. Each player had a full piece of paper with an 18 hole grid to make sure we counted all the strokes and penalties correctly... (Shit, that made my Drysophila Melanogaster's Chi Square look elementary)

We get up early Friday and make our way over to the Wanker's house. While Mr. Wanker took wanker jr and wankerette to Granny's house, we looked at his new deck - WOW! No freaking way I could have done what he did. 3 tier deck complete with lights inlaid on the stairs that lead down to the outdoor fireplace. It looks great BUT i am still concerned about the fire's we might have in that thing and the overhanging trees. (Fire Dept is 2 miles away.)

We get to the Golf Course and it is already hot. Go to pay and there is a sign on the clubhouse door - Beware of Aligator on #6. That's all it says. Do they think that is enough of a disclaimer? We get out there and I am shooting TERRIBLE! Put it to you this way, I shot 6 under par on the front - thats a 66 on the front I should have quit right there. It was a test of patience to try and keep score. OK, I got an 8 with at 3 putt, 2 shots in the same trap, 1 lost ball, double par, drive didn't make it past ladies tees= shit 1 hold could cost you $10.

By the end of the day I was down more than double than anyone else in the Penalty Bucket. I had to win that one but the Wanker won it on a 1 putt from 20 feet. Short fucker.

Poker wasn't much better but it seems like I was able to fold when needed and stay in hands when I felt good. I never had a big stack bacause people kept buying chips from me. So I had money but never many chips. Towards the end of the night it got a little heated and I got put out. Rogman won the big game and came out ahead >$200. It's about 2am and Money says "I still have $20 - let's keep playing." Well I turn on the jets and have a pretty good lead but when it got down to just 2 of us I offered the other guy a split of the pot which took me ahead for the day by $10, damn golf penalties. Time to sleep @ 3:30.

9am came pretty damn early and I was not a happy camper. Oooof. My stomach was not looking forward to getting out on the water... Ooof. Money, Rogman, even the Wanker cracked beers as soon as we got into the water. I just sat there. Ooof. We made it down the Ashley River and were going to cross the Harbor to the Cooper but Wank says, nah, let's get lunch first. GREAT idea. I needed greasy food and a place to use the facilities. Took a MONSTER and by the time I got back to the table a double Captain n Sprite was waiting for me. Shit, there was no Sprite in there. Greasy fries, just what the Dr. ordered. I'm back. Bring me another drink... I just think I was full of shit - literally. We head across the Harbor, my first time going from river to river and the little boat was bouncing all over the place. The new Cooper River Bridge is really impressive. Then back to the Ashley. The tide had been going out all day and was still going out. We drove almost all they way back in about 2 feet of water or less. Wanker's never had so much weight in his boat at low tide before. Me and Rogman had to be on opposite sides of the boat... Kinda hairy up the river. "I don't know where we're going but one look at you Captain and I know it's going to be hot." compliments of Chief from Apocalypse Now.

We get back right in front of the thunderstorm.
Dinner at the Wanker's was great... He didn't want to cut/chop the boston butt so he hand picked the whole thing. Kinda over kill but it was damn good. More beers, more good times. After dinner I kinda missed some of the conversation. I was nodding off like a mo-fo. Jesus I was tired. Money and I made it back to Momma's house and I couldnt keep my eyes open. No going out tonight.

Sunday I felt MUCH better after getting some sleep. Time to work. I cut some bushes, and then pulled out the old pool cover. THat was NASTY as shit. Money helped me put on the new one, so at least 1 chore was done. We made it back to Madra Rua for brunch. LET THE DRINKING BEGIN... Start with a Smithwicks and Money has Bloody Mary. Couple of these later here comes the Rogman. He proceeds to explain that no Brunch is complete without Red Bull Mimosas... Ooof. Couple of those then back to beer. We get out of there close to 3 and get to the airport - just in time for the Rain. FINALLY make it back to ATL.

WHAT A WEEKEND...
Have I fully recovered??? I hope not...
One thing I do know is - I have the Best Friends in the World... I will put up my friends against anyone elses friends in a WWE Battle Royal and know that we came in with the Belt and we're going out with the Belt -because they are THE BEST IN THIS SPORT TODAY - Woooo!!!! thank you Ric Flair.